On this page, we talk about how you can become more confident.

On this page:

• Why it is important to become confident
• How you can become more confident
• Example story

Some people do not believe in themselves.

They might feel this way if:

• they have had hard experiences
• someone has told them they cannot do much in their life.

When people do not believe in themselves, it can stop them from living the way they want.

When you are confident, it can:

• help you believe in yourself
• make it easier for you to achieve your goals
• improve your relationships.

  Your relationship with someone is how you are connected to them.

Part of being confident means that you accept the things about you that are not perfect.

It also means that you believe you can get past barriers in your life.

Everyone has moments in their life when they do not believe in themselves.

But you can learn to become more confident.

You do not need to make a lot of big changes.

You can do small things to help yourself become more confident.

We made a list of things you can do to become more confident.

You can look after yourself.

For example, you can take part in activities that make you feel good.

You can also explore ideas about how to look after yourself.

You can find out more on our page about caring for yourself.

You can get to know yourself better.

It is a good idea to understand what you:

• are good at
• want to get better at
• can do to become more confident.

For example, you can learn how to understand and manage your feelings.

You can find out more on our page about knowing how to understand and manage your feelings.

You can set goals that you can achieve.

When you set big goals, it is a good idea to break them up into smaller goals.

Smaller goals can:

• be easier to achieve
• help you feel confident to reach your bigger goals.

You can be kind to yourself.

You might have bad thoughts about yourself.

When this happens, you can try to tell yourself something positive instead.

For example, if you think you cannot do something, you can tell yourself that you can do it.

You can imagine yourself doing well.

And as a person who:

• is confident
• achieves their goals.

When you imagine yourself doing something, it can help you get ready for it.

You can practise telling other people what you want and need.

You can also explain what your boundaries are.

You can try to practise sharing these things in a way that:

• respects other people
• is easy for other people to understand.

To start, you can share what you think with someone you know well.

In the future, you can share what you think with people you do not know well.

You can improve how you communicate and listen.

It is easier to get to know other people when you can communicate and listen well.

It is a good idea to learn how to share your thoughts in a way that is:

• confident
• kind.

You can also choose a way to communicate that works best for you.

For example, you might choose to write down your thoughts instead of speaking.

It is a good idea to tell yourself to be proud of the skills you have to communicate.

You can make sure you do not give up.

Sometimes barriers will get in your way.

When this happens, you must not give up on what you want to do in your life.

Some barriers can give you the chance to:

• learn
• try again.

You can try to find support when you need it.

It is a good idea to talk to someone you trust when you need support.

For example, you can:

• talk to your friends
• talk to your family members
• get counselling.

  Counselling is when you work with someone to explore how you think and feel.

  • This can help you:
  • reach goals
  • feel safe
  • learn skills
  • understand what happened to you.

You can keep learning.

It is a good idea to keep learning.

This can help you become more confident.

For example, you can:

• learn new skills
• read books about what you can do to improve your wellbeing.

You can find people who:

• are confident
• can teach you to be confident.

You can celebrate the things you achieve.

It is a good idea to celebrate the things you achieve, no matter how big or small they are.

For example, you can:

• have a party
• treat yourself to something nice
• share what you achieved with your friends.

It is a good idea to be patient.

It takes time to become more confident.

It is also important to keep working to become more confident.

This means not letting barriers stop you.

You can do things that you might not be comfortable with.

You can try to challenge yourself by doing things that:

• are new to you
• scare you a little.

You can become more confident each time you do something you are not quite comfortable with.

We wrote a story to show an example of someone trying to become more confident.

The story we wrote is about a person called Amara.

The story and the people in it are not real.

We made them up to explain someone trying to become more confident.

Amara wants to go to university.

But when Amara thinks about applying for university, she feels stupid.

She also thinks and says bad things about herself.

Amara would never talk to a friend the way she talks to herself.

Amara decides to work on becoming more confident.

She realises that she cannot know how well she will do at university until she becomes confident enough to apply.